What do you do when the world doesn't make sense to you? Or how do you learn to cope with the world when you realize your own uselessness?
Do you accept fate or whatever you want to term it? Or do you stand up despite the circumstances and be labeled arrogant?
I don't know how to answer these questions. All I can see is my future crumbling down and turning into dust, constantly. How do you walk into a future like that, without the slightest sense of fatality and discouragement?
Where does one the find courage to walk into darkness knowing things will come to an end? Where does one find the strength to do that? How do I that, when I myself am convinced that I cannot do anything about it?
Belief? But how do you know that your belief is not blind when you are the only person who believes whatever you believe? How can you test that it is not utter horseshit? And by chance, if you do know that it is not horseshit, how do you convince the world to share your perspective?
Ultimately how do you know that you yourself aren't speaking horseshit?
When you are in doubt how do you convince the world to think otherwise?
Where do you find absolute answers to such questions, that pop up all the time. In my experience, there is no place in the world that can answer these questions with absolute certainty. The world at best can provide you with suggestions or advice. How do I answer these unanswerable questions?
I cannot to ignore them and go on because, the world, the society demands answers. Answers that I do not have, which in the eyes of the world is equivalent to being to wrong and 'in over one's head'.
Does not having a plan for the future make me a liability to society? Cannot I not live in the moment and improvise?
What is the point of making plans if life does not let you keep them? What good is a plan that will be discarded before it is implemented? What good is it to plan when you don't know the future yourself?
These just maybe thoughts of a incapable, lazy mind. My mind. I'm not the best the human race has to offer, in fact, I maybe the worst. Zero productive and a large waste of space.
How does one combat one's own uselessness, even after knowing so? I know the answer to that, and the answer is - to do something. Something that has significance and meaning in this world and to the people in this world. But, knowing is not equivalent to doing. It takes a lot to convert the former into the latter. Something, I fear, I might not have.
"All words and no action." I fear my own fatality. My own lack of inspiration to do, to create something in this world. This will be the end of me. And all, I feel is helplessness. Watching myself slowly burn down to the ground and all I am doing is watching it happen; distant, unmotivated and fatalistic.
I am afraid that I will not have the strength to save myself when the time comes. And I don't think that there could be anything worse than that.
At times like these, I wish an angel would appear out of nowhere and guide me in to the light. But, all I have is myself. There is not much comfort I can take from that. But I guess, that will have to do, for now.
Do you accept fate or whatever you want to term it? Or do you stand up despite the circumstances and be labeled arrogant?
I don't know how to answer these questions. All I can see is my future crumbling down and turning into dust, constantly. How do you walk into a future like that, without the slightest sense of fatality and discouragement?
Where does one the find courage to walk into darkness knowing things will come to an end? Where does one find the strength to do that? How do I that, when I myself am convinced that I cannot do anything about it?
Belief? But how do you know that your belief is not blind when you are the only person who believes whatever you believe? How can you test that it is not utter horseshit? And by chance, if you do know that it is not horseshit, how do you convince the world to share your perspective?
Ultimately how do you know that you yourself aren't speaking horseshit?
When you are in doubt how do you convince the world to think otherwise?
Where do you find absolute answers to such questions, that pop up all the time. In my experience, there is no place in the world that can answer these questions with absolute certainty. The world at best can provide you with suggestions or advice. How do I answer these unanswerable questions?
I cannot to ignore them and go on because, the world, the society demands answers. Answers that I do not have, which in the eyes of the world is equivalent to being to wrong and 'in over one's head'.
Does not having a plan for the future make me a liability to society? Cannot I not live in the moment and improvise?
What is the point of making plans if life does not let you keep them? What good is a plan that will be discarded before it is implemented? What good is it to plan when you don't know the future yourself?
These just maybe thoughts of a incapable, lazy mind. My mind. I'm not the best the human race has to offer, in fact, I maybe the worst. Zero productive and a large waste of space.
How does one combat one's own uselessness, even after knowing so? I know the answer to that, and the answer is - to do something. Something that has significance and meaning in this world and to the people in this world. But, knowing is not equivalent to doing. It takes a lot to convert the former into the latter. Something, I fear, I might not have.
"All words and no action." I fear my own fatality. My own lack of inspiration to do, to create something in this world. This will be the end of me. And all, I feel is helplessness. Watching myself slowly burn down to the ground and all I am doing is watching it happen; distant, unmotivated and fatalistic.
I am afraid that I will not have the strength to save myself when the time comes. And I don't think that there could be anything worse than that.
At times like these, I wish an angel would appear out of nowhere and guide me in to the light. But, all I have is myself. There is not much comfort I can take from that. But I guess, that will have to do, for now.
